I read a blog today on the More Than Lupus website titled More Than Brave

discussing the frustration many in the chronic illness community have when someone calls them brave. The author quoted the Oxford dictionary definition of brave as being 'Ready to face and endure danger or pain, with no fear.' 

It was a very good and thought provoking article but I must disagree I believe the definition it was based on is flawed.

I do not think bravery requires us to not be afraid. Not that I'm saying I am smarter than the folks at Oxford but I think their definition is more akin to that of a physcopath than a brave person because they tend to find dangerous and life-threatening situations as enjoyable. On the contrary, I think the presence of fear in us increases our bravery. 

Let's consider the first responders on 9/11, the men and women who raced UP the stairs in those doomed towers while others were running DOWN them. To say they had no fear is delusional. Of course they were afraid, but when faced with the fear of death they did not shrink back but chose to risk every thing to save lives. They charged into the buildings with their fear screaming 'GO BACK! SAVE YOURSELF!'

I think a better definition of brave would be 'Ready to face and endure danger or pain, DESPITE fear. 

As my wife said when we were discussing this this morning, lack of fear in dangerous and life-threatening situations is not brave, it is stupidity. 

Does bravery require choosing to fight?

One of the things mentioned in the article was that the terms warrior, fighter, overcomer, etc. require the person to choose to fight and we did not choose this battle. But does it really? Many men here in the states were drafted into the revolutionary and world wars. They did not make a choice to join the battle and I am sure those young men were scared to death, yet they fought valiantly despite that fear.

Does their disqualify them from being brave? Certainly not. It instead makes them even more brave!

Chronic illness IS a war and we are no less brave because it (as my southern grandparents would say) scares the living daylights out of us. 

Long Covid Legends? Really?

When I began this journey we call the long haul in May of '23  I saw the battle-wearied individauls who had lost their identity, sense of self-worth, and purpose after years of seemingly hopeless struggle, and wanted to change that.

I wanted to remind them they are no less of an amazing person as if they were in perfect health, working a 9-5, and going to social gatherings every night. That is why I began DIAGNOSIS:HOPE. I want, in some small way, to 'change the narrative' of not only how the world sees us, but more importantly, how we see ourselves.  

That is why I came up with the phrase Long Covid Legend. 

Our illness, our body's weakness, does not and should not define us! We are sick, suffering individuals, yes, but that does not mean we are not brave. On the contrary, even on our worst days, when we cannot get out of bed because of the pain, and fatigue, If we fall asleep that night, despite knowing we will have to face it all again the next day, without giving up the fignt and  'ending it all' we are not only brave but in my book LEGENDARY! 

I realize legend is not really a term that would apply to a community is often times considered 'invisible. After all, the definition of legend is 'an extremely famous or notorious person'. We may not be famous and it is very true that we are 'invisible' to many, but we should be famous!  

After all, we are the ones who get out of bed, brush our teeth, take a shower and then, though we have spent most or all of our energy and feel like we have run a marathon we still face the day. Whether that spent in bed or at work, getting our kids to school, cleaning the house, or even simply cooking dinner for the family we KEEP...ON...GOING!

Despite today's current narrative, we are not lazy, we are not liars, and we certainly are not lunatics...we are LEGENDS and history will remember our resilience, even if only in the eyes of those who love us who see our bravery (though barely surving at times) through good and bad days. And for those of us who have been abondoned by loved ones, you too will be famous because your peers in this wonderful community think you are amazing!

Remember: You are not lazy. You are not a liar. You are not a lunatic. No my friend, you are a LEGEND!

May the Lord bless you and keep you,

Lee

What are your thoughts? Is being called brave something that upsets you?